25 Years & Nothing to Show for it

10:03 pm: A week ago, I turned 25.

10:13 pm: I’ve been blankly staring at that statement.

I’ve just wasted 10 minutes of my life. But 10 minutes is nothing compared to 25 years of wastefulness.

Tick, tock goes the clock. Tick, tock
tick, tock. that’s the sound of my life passing before me.

I just spent another 9 minutes trying to get that damn GIF to work properly.

So however much I dreaded turning 25, and still do, for some God-forsaken reason, I have a good feeling about this year. Maybe, it’s because I’ve been doing some growing up, righting my wrongs and trying to be a fairly decent person (when I want to be).

I’ve still quite the medley of wrongs to right but I’m growing the balls and soon enough I should be debt-free, metaphorically. I’m going to drown in the more literal sense for at least the next quarter of a century. Thank you, college edumucation.

Let’s see. I’m excellent at: writing research papers, speaking French, utilizing the Dewey decimal system, reading things.
I’m not so excellent at: organization of other people’s things, social interactions, public speaking.

So pretty much, I need to work in the back corner on a lower level of a library that no one knows exists, right? I’ll take museum as well.

If I ever produce offsprings, they will not pursuit their dreams. He or she or they will become engineers or lawyers or orthodontists. Something profitable. None of this “shoot for the stars” bullshit. Because that just isn’t ever going to happen. Also, those stars are dead. They are reflecting the sun’s beams of light. You shoot for the stars? Have fun watching the world crush your hopes and dreams because you were told you’ll land on some other star or whatnot. Good luck trying, champ. But really, call me and tell me how wrong I am if that ever happens.

End of my whining. My bad.

On a lighter note, hopefully, there will be some good to come out of this 25 year rut I seem to be stuck in. Fingers crossed. Maybe just maybe, end of April or May 2015, I will have my ducks in a row and be making a rather life-altering move. Stay tuned and watch me fail miserably at all the things along the way. It’ll be entertaining if nothing else.

There is a light at the end of the never-ending tunnel.



***I went to the grocery store yesterday and made a grocery list. Here is my list:

I needed white wine. Obviously, I wrote it 'wwhine'.

I needed white wine. Obviously, I wrote it ‘wwhine’.

I also may be the only person who thinks that is remotely funny. Whatever, give me a large glass of whine, please and thank you.***


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